My new Gibson J-185 jumbo

Ok back to normal whatever that is. I just bought a Gibson J-185 jumbo acoustic. Very nice I can't believe the sound it puts out. Im speachless and in love. I protected that thing with my life during the Hurricane. It was in the closet with us during the BIG SCARE. I figured if we were trapped I could at least play a few tunes or use it as a floatation device for the family....

We are ok

Just a post for now to say to everybody thanks for your concerns. Hurricanes are not rare down here, but when tornados are thrown in the mix it gets very scary. I will post some pictures when I get my family settled down. Im concerned for Gina she got hit bad. Some folks in Cape Coral got hurt a lot worse. My home will be bigger and better thanks to insurance. Thanks everybody especially you Rachel michael :)

Gina's Hand bags

Here are pictures of Gina's handbags. These are all handmade and all original. She is currently working on an Elvis and Bob Dylan handbag, also a Purple Skull handbag.

Having fun!!!

After listening to Gary's great song he wrote. I thought I would pull out an old one that I did a long time ago when I got my first recorder Boss BR-800. This is a nice driving around tune. Maybe good for Rachels Attic show???? Please copy and paste:
http://s25.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=19LD8N5MCZ28V1RQ8FAI1IX7LJ

New song "Anonymous"

Here is the song I wrote about an anonymous person who has personal problems. Which is why he is so vengfull. please click and go. I admit I rushed it and needs work. My piano playing still is shakey at best, but what do you want from me I just started at 40!!!
http://s25.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=0CDQ0MQLV1DD3LJNHAETK5944

Escaping

What was I running from?
Why was I poisoning my soul?
What was I going to gain?
What kind of father was I?
All these questions I ask myself when I wake up in cold sweats at night. I have bad dreams, but they aren't dreams anymore they are memories. Memories of heroin, cocaine and alcohol. My 3 vices. I would turn to these, mostly heroin when I felt a certain way. I can't explain what I felt to make me start using. My problems never went away either. They just got worse. I still would play with my boys, even on heroin.. Because I could, but half the time I would just nod off for what seemed hours, but was seconds. I would come to with Mikey pinching my cheek. "Daddy, Daddy..I said look at me". I would give him a little smile and wink with my half open eyelid.
I ripped off my kids. I ripped of their memories. They should off had different memories of that time playing. I can only hope they don't remember...
Never shot up. I found that disgusting.. Imagine that (disgusting...Me). I would sit down with my acoustic sometimes and took a couple sniffs. Thinking it would help my creative juices. Bullshit. The only creative juices were the ones dripping on the strings from my already red nostrils. I joke about it to myself now sometimes, just so I don't cry. I don't mind what I did to myself, but what I did to my children. They deserve more than these memories.
Economically I took care of the family. Making 180,000.00 per year with no college I thought was doing good. Anytime they needed something I got it done. I gave them the best of everything...Except myself.
I will sit down with the boys and explain myself to them, so I can guide them in the right direction of life. I worry about them more and more now. Maybe because Im getting older. Or maybe because I hope they don't grow up to be like I was.
I think I used the drugs to escape. Escape myself. I kept looking in the mirror and I kept seeing my father(the biological one). The one who left us when I was 3, Gina 2, and Kathy 4. I've been trying so hard not to become him. But everytime I looked in the mirror, there he was.
Sounds like a good song, not this one.. I remember hearing the song "Father of Mine". Heard it once then every time after that I would hit the power button to turn it off. I think I've been trying to escape my whole life. Escape what????
I need to make sure I am ok so I can do my "JOB" and take care of my loved ones who count on me. That's what I'm doing. My life now couldn't be better. Well it could be a little better. I have a great family, who returns the love and affection I give them. I have great friends on the Blogsites that make me feel good when we write back and forth. My health is good.
So what am I trying to escape from?..... The itch...The little voice...The craving... The wonder if..
It's a long road and everyday is a test of strength. That's why I keep playing, recording and listening to music. Thanks Pete, for making words and music I can escape to now. I'm not saying Pete Townshend saves my life. His words and music put me in a zone where I feel happy and can focus on what is really important...ME.

Re-Rerecording...and.... Rererecording

Frustration builds as I still am toiling with the Boss1600. I went to Music Mikeys Blog site where he gave me a couple of pointers, thanks Mikey. But it really doesnt matter how much you know about recording. You have to be in the "ether" . I know nothing about piano, but I figured out the begining of "Gettin in Tune" which goes thru the whole song basically. I tried -cut, tried-cut, tried-cut. I couldn't get it perfect. Then it hit me "I was trying".
So, I hit record, took a deep breath, and played....just played. With the words in my head I felt my fingers not hit but caress the keys in a melodic way. It flowed. Please sit back a imagine it. Bling ding, bling ding, bling ding, bling ding. bling dang bling dang bling dang bling ding dang...etc.
I looked down and I was done...My hands weren't stiff. I was so relaxed and it was done. I played it back, again, again...how nice it felt. I talk about music all the time, since I was 8 yrs old my friends and family had commented on my views. I remember telling my mother that there was no such thing as noise and I would bet her I would figure out the notes the sounds would make by humming and could humm a song out. She said I was making her scared. So I hummed in my head.
Ok that part was done, now how the fuck do I add the drums this far in....Back to the drawing board. I'm going to do these with out drums. Recording is fun when you don't have to work. Just get in the "ether". I see why Pete was so frustrated on Who's next. This shit you have to do isnt fun. The non creative part. I know its being creative in a way but...I dont know. I think I will have someone come out and set it all up for me. Mikey is the most luckiest guy in the world. Pete, the great freind he is, went over and spent a week setting his up. I knew I liked Pete for a reason.

Fathers Day 1997

Sometimes you get discouraged
Because I am so small
And always leave my fingerprints
On furniture and walls.

But every day I'm growing
I'll be all grown up someday
And all those tiny fingerprints
Will surely fade away.

So here's a final hand print
Just so you can recall
Exactly how my fingers lookes,
When I was very small

Cherrish your time with your children.

Friday

Ring....
hello
hello :)
what are you doing..
working
yeah
yeah... did you forget to tell me something
uhmmmm...maybe
MAYBE???.. I got a letter from suncoast saying my car is paid off..
ohhh yeah I was going to tell you that..
when???
today???
what did you get me..
the 2004 Murano your driving..
I don't like this car..
but we will be in a much better position with this one..
I don't care!!!!
don't worry about it, just drive it for a couple of months and when something you really like comes in we will trade it
what the fuck!!!
what?
what do you mean WHAT!!!
why are you freaking out, its a nice car..
I don't want it..
fine..
FINE
fine....
FINE..
fine.......
FIIIIIIIIIINE........
click....beep,beep, beep, beep, beep
shit........................
Ring, ring, ring,
Good afternoon.....
Yes, I would like to have flowers delivered........................

Drowned Again..

Here is a link for DROWNED believe me it needs work. My kids were running around me while I was singing and its my first go at keyboards. Never played piano so this is all by ear. Im working on this song now and "LETS SEE ACTION" please paste on this http://s35.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=0VELZVKGTOQRH0T5IC7GDDLSBF